I know, I really need to get better about blogging... I have so much to say and you would think I would say it.. but, LIFE HAPPENS!!!
We are redoing our basement, I dance, dance, dance... never home, teaching is taking its toll, then my sweet kids broke our toilet, and yep that's my chaos in a nut shell!
So, I have seen a lot of you asking about sleepovers. These are some of the things that we have done that worked and were found helpful. I know that some of your kids are getting into the age where they want to have sleepovers, or even go to a different friends house.
SCARY, ANXIETY and OOOOH MYYY
It's hard there is no getting around that.
So, Mattie was 6 and newly diagnosed, 1st grade was exciting and fun with cute friends. I would have Mattie invite her friends over to our house, just to play...
So, I could see how well they reacted to her when she has to stop and test or when she is low etc.. Once I knew how this friend was going to be, we would have her sleep over, and yes they are CRAZY, WILD and SILLY GIRLS!!
LOUD and oh my very LOUD...
The other really important thing is EDUCATION... we didn't shy away from our friends, I wanted Mattie to be who she is in front of them. We tested with them, gave shots every thing with her cute friends and we also explained the WHYS, WHAT, WHEN, HOWS!! All the while we were getting acquainted with our friends parents too, and ALL of them were super and willing to be apart of Mattie!! PHEW
We would talk to them about how she acts different when low or high, we were always answering questions, until NOW!! They get it!
After dad and I felt comfortable,. we would allow Mattie a play day at her house. I would drop her off and told Mattie to call WHENEVER she ATE or felt funny..we also wouldn't go anywhere just in case she needed us FAST. The parents would call and ask if she could eat something or do something, which was nice. The parents got to trust Mattie as well, they would know " OK, Mattie is not lying she really can eat this or that" and that was important too. Mattie has been pretty good about following the rules! funny thing is the first time I dropped her off, all by her little self. I sat in my car three houses down and cried. I wanted her all to my self.
Mind you this was ALL of 1st grade, I really don't think she spent the night at a friends house til about 3rd or 4th grade.. But WOW we sure had lots of sleep overs at my house!!
We discussed the RULES!!
1. 15 carbs 15 minutes later
2. Always a liquid first
3. Call MOM
4. Wash your hands before testing
5. Test and test some more
6. DON'T EAT W/OUT TALKING TO MOM OR DAD!!!
Yes, we did have some slip ups,... and then there were no play dates, and no sleepovers. I would explain to her that she gets those things when she is showing responsibility for herself. The hardest part is letting go, letting them be independent and feel NORMAL. Mattie did make some mistakes, but a long the way she gained FREEDOM for herself and a sense of pride.
Just two sat's ago, she spent the night at my uncles house. He asked her if she wanted some coke, and Mattie tested and was a bit high, she said " no, I will just have water." Then in the morning her blood sugar was 72... so she measured 4oz of juice drank it and waited 15 minutes... all the while they asked her if she wanted to eat yet, "no, my sugar is low so I have to wait"
PROUD, PROUD, PROUD!!
When I went to get her my uncle came out and told me how amazing she is and responsible...
Mattie was beaming ear to ear, she was so excited that she did the right things, and she said " I feel so good and now my sugars are going to be good all day"
We have also had " Mom, I'm at 300 and were eating, it's pizza." me "well here is the insulin and you HAVE TO wait 30 minutes to eat" mattie "Mom, no" crying blah blah blah... " Mattie if you can't follow the rules, you will come home and I will babysit you!!" mattie " Fine" Click.. yep she would hang up on me!!
I let it go, I didn't go get her and I didn't get mad. I don't blame her for her frustrations. When she got home we just talked about how it was and how hanging up is not NICE!!
Or she has also eaten with out calling me.. Kev would get mad that the parents didn't call us, and I would explain to him that WE are her parents and Mattie is the diabetic... it's our responsibility to teach her and guide her to be responsible. Although, we would talk with the parents and make sure they knew Mattie has to call before eating.
Mattie has chosen good friends and all of the parents are good to work with, we have the confidence in Mattie to do what is right, and we know that she is still a kid and will make mistakes. Sleepovers are a part of a kids life and I hope this helps, I probably rambled on more than I needed too!!
Questions? just ask!!
Winter Solstice
11 months ago
Sleepovers???? I can't even FATHOM that yet!!! :) So glad you are one of those who have been there and done that so that when my turn comes I can freak out on you! :)
ReplyDeleteYou're doing a great job with Mattie-- you have every reason to be proud!!
Good to have a blog from you again!!
Sleepovers are a crazy animal. But they are doable. It's a special treat for my boys, so I cut them a lot of slack.
ReplyDeleteGreat idea to feel out the friends first, before having them sleep over. Making sure they are helpful, supportive and not overwhelmed by it all. :)
We are only at the "playdate" stage...hopefully sleepovers in the next year or two. Joe is sooo ready. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing everything! Ill just tell Avery he can have as many sleep overs as he wants as long as they are all at my house ;) Lets see how long that will last huh?!?!
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